I will not look at you like this anymore…

People I love tell me interesting things. They tell me of their anxieties and their ‘fear attacks’ and their depression and their suicidal tendencies… This is not just one or two of the people I love, this is the vast majority of them.I can count an easy 3 within the last few hours alone.

I got to thinking today… What if I refused to see it as real? What if I got so clear and committed and absolute in my ability to see the person standing in front of me as a divine, whole and completely equal co-creator that I ceased being able to see them as anything else? What if I stopped supporting their (your) stories of having ‘social anxiety’ or ‘depression’ or ‘being suicidal’? I know this is ‘dangerous’ ground I’m treading, I know your ‘pain body’* may be willing to go to war with me right now… But hear me out… Or stop reading.

I am not proposing that I ignore you and your suffering. In fact, I’m proposing the complete opposite. I’m proposing that I get willing to look at your pain and suffering with such intensity and presence that I see through it. You are not your pain and your suffering, you forget this sometimes. You are infinitely capable and complete. There is nothing ‘broken’ about you. I have been willing to support that story of ‘brokenness’ in many of my loved ones for many years now, it doesn’t serve any of us any more. If I am willing and able to see myself as divine and connected and powerful and infinitely creative (And I am, more and more so.)… Then I have to be willing and able to see you in the same way. Nothing else is sustainable. Everything else is my ego having a wank-fest and fostering separation over connection. Everything in you that is perpetuating your stories of being ‘less than’ and ‘broken’ and ‘a failure’ and ‘a fuck up’… They are all just twisted ego-fests that support hierarchical notions of separation and leave us all wanting and dissatisfied. Stop it. I will not look at you like this any more. I will not support our separation and our disconnect.

You are not broken.

You are not a failure.

You are not incomplete, ‘less than’ or wanting.


You are powerful.

You are whole.

You are infinitely creative.

You are equal.

You are incredibly important.

You are worthy of all your good and all your deepest desires.

You are an exquisitely loving agent of change.

You are so deeply loved, cherished and adored.


I refuse to see you as anything else.

Categorically refuse.

I’m done with holding space for your delusions (and my own!).

I am committed to holding space for your completeness, your knowing and your profoundly loving, radical change.

I am prepared to be very stubborn about this….




No, seriously, VERY stubborn.




*If you’re not familiar with the concept of a ‘pain body’, go get yourself immersed in some Eckhart Tolle!